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Canine Commentary
"If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to
go where they went." - Will Rogers
"We give dogs time we can spare, space we can spare, and love
we can spare. And in return, dogs give us their all. It's the best
deal man has ever made" - M. Facklam
"Dogs love their friends and bite their enemies, quite unlike
people, who are incapable of pure love and always have to mix love
and hate." - Sigmund Freud
"The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his
tail instead of his tongue." - Anonymous
"Dogs need to sniff the ground; it's how they keep abreast
of current events. The ground is a giant dog newspaper, containing
all kinds of late-breaking dog news items, which, if they are especially
urgent, are often continued in the next yard." - Dave Barry
"Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed
a dog." - Franklin P. Jones
"If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise."
- Unknown
"I wonder what goes through his mind when he sees us peeing
in his water bowl." - Penny Ward Moser
"A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around
three times before lying down." - Robert Benchley
"No animal should ever jump up on the dining-room furniture
unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation."
- Fran Lebowitz
"I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird
religious cult." - Rita Rudner
"My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to
$3.00 a can. That's almost $21.00 in dog money." - Joe Weinstein
"Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence
that you are wonderful." - Ann Landers
"There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking
your face." Ben Williams
"A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than
he loves himself." - Josh Billings
"Outside of a dog, a book is probably man's best friend; inside
of a dog, it's too dark to read." - Groucho Marx
"Ever consider what dogs must think of us? I mean, here we
come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul -- chicken,
pork, half a cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on
earth!" - Anne Tyler
"If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain
dogs I have known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons."
- James Thurber
"Women and cats will do as they please and men and dogs should
relax and get used to the idea." - Robert A. Heinlein
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